Hello fellow internet readers and bloggers, I was not planning on doing any writing today, but my daughter Rylie had other plans. You see, most mornings are quite routine around here. I wake up, have my coffee, catch up on the latest ANNOYING Social Media posts, and finally when all that is said and done, I get my baby girl out of bed. We have the “normal” run of the mill type situation; she eats her breakfast, I do the dishes, make my phone calls or texts, and proceed to get my girl out of her booster seat, play with her a little, give her the iPad for an hour, and watch one of my shows.
I am not pleased to say that, besides my best laid plans, things did not go quite as according to plan. It started when my daughter decided that not only was she not going to eat the cereal that I made her, but she was also going to dump it onto the floor, (milk and all) so that I could spend 20 minutes cleaning up the spilled Cheerios and scrubbing the milk out of the carpet. As if this was not enough, she then decided that she wanted to stand by the refrigerator and cry the most ungodly screaming cry that I have ever heard, because she wanted a piece of cheese. YES EVERYONE, she had a total meltdown over a Babybel Cheese. Instead of the insanely loud, blood curdling screaming and crying, she could have just asked me for it. Nope, she decided to lose her tiny little mind over some cheese, while completely making sure my nerves were shot! As if this was not enough, she has now been in her crib for the past 10 minutes screaming at the top of her lungs, because she obviously does not want to take the nap, the same exact nap that she takes every single day, at the same exact time since she has been a year old. For those wondering, that makes it an almost solid year of the exact same routine. This is the first time she has ever done this.
So, as I am typing away on my laptop, I am also listening to the amazing musical stylings of my 22 month olds, screaming, and pleading of many different types of extremely loud noises. On top of that, my husband who is at work in NYC decides to call me on video phone to show me how he’s riding around his office on a tricycle. Yes, you read that correctly, while I am home about to literally rip my hair out, he is just having the time of his life riding around a totally empty office building and laughing with his fellow employees. Don’t get me wrong I love my husband and father of my demon child, I just wish maybe I could spend my days riding around an office on a tricycle, skateboard, regular old bicycle, or really anything instead of being here trapped with what looks like my daughter, but I am pretty sure is some kind of tiny psycho imposter.
Well, since Rylie (my daughter) still hasn’t stopped screaming, I am going to go get her and see what in the hell is going on with her. All you mothers out there who can relate, please leave a comment below, and also say a prayer, or whatever it is you do for me, so that I get through this day without ripping out all my hair or scheduling a flight to some far away tropical island where my husband can come home and deal with all this. Especially since, I am pretty sure he thinks I sit home all day, watch TV, drink coffee, and lounge around.
See ya’ll next time when I can hopefully formulate a thought without a tiny human screaming so loud that, I can hardly even think straight!!!!!
Much love and respect to all my readers and fellow parents. I will be back as soon as I have something worth writing, therefore being read by whoever decides to take part in this CRAZY ASS WOMAN’S MIND!